MID LIFE
I've seen two shows lately that went on and on about how mid life is a great time for women. Just last week Oprah had a whole show on how great menopause will be....
Puhleeeeeeeze!
I've had a few thoughts of my own and would like to share them with you. Whether you are pushing 40, 50, 60 (or maybe even just pushing your luck) you'll probably relate.
Mid life is when the growth of hair on our legs slows down. This gives us plenty of time to care for our newly acquired mustache.
In mid life women no longer have upper arms ~ we have wingspans. We are no longer women in sleeveless shirts ~ we are flying squirrels in drag.
Mid life is when you can stand naked in front of a mirror and you can see your rear without turning around.
Mid life is when you go for a mammogram and you realize that this is the only time someone will ask you to appear topless.
Mid life is when you want to grab every firm young lovely in a tube top and scream, "Listen honey, even the Roman Empire fell and those will too."
Mid life brings wisdom to know that life throws us curves and we're sitting on our biggest ones.
Mid life is when you look at your-know-it-all, beeper-wearing teenager and think: "For this I have stretch marks?"
In mid life your memory starts to go. In fact the only thing we can retain is water.
Mid life means that your Body By Jake now includes Legs By Rand McNally -- more red and blue lines than an accurately scaled map of Wisconsin.
Mid life means that you become more reflective...You start pondering the "big" questions. What is life? Why am I here? How much Healthy Choice ice cream can I eat before it's no longer a healthy choice?
Courtesy of Joelle
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